


I Want to Break Free

by SentientBentley



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Abuse, Boys Kissing, Crowley is Good at Being a Demon (Good Omens), Cute, Demons, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fashion & Couture, First Kiss, Flirting, Fluff, M/M, Psychological Trauma, Queen (Band) References, Rare Pairings, References to David Bowie, Soft Crowley (Good Omens), Sweet, Verbal Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:40:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29247429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SentientBentley/pseuds/SentientBentley
Summary: Eric the Disposable Demon has had a rough time in Hell, working for Duke Hastur. All that changes when his crush shows up with a new proposal for his boss.
Relationships: Crowley & Disposable Demon (Good Omens), Crowley/Disposable Demon (Good Omens)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 13
Collections: Rare Omens





	1. Brand New Dance

**Author's Note:**

> Rating is mostly for a brief scene of intimidation by Hastur, plus some flashbacks of verbal abuse from him. I've tried to cover this in the tags. Chapters 1 and 3 deal with it the most, and it's briefly mentioned in chapter 4.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW for intimidation, verbal abuse by Hastur; work is tagged.

“I’ve had enough of this”.

Duke Hastur walked around the cold room, cigarette smoke wafting around the dank walls and irritating Eric’s nostrils.

The Disposable Demon, hunched against the wall, winced as Hastur approached.

“I need details from your last assignment. I was informed you lost your target”. Hastur leaned down in front of him. “Do you have _anything_ for me?”

Eric shook his head, gulping. Hastur took another drag on his cigarette, contemplating throwing it in Eric’s face, but there was someone here now. Eric heard the _clack_ of boots on the freezing floor, and he relaxed.

_Oh, thank Satan._

“Another one”, Hastur growled, frowning. “You’re late”.

“What’d you expect?” The shadow outside the door grew longer, and Eric tried not to gasp at the lanky frame leaning against the doorway, gorgeous red hair spiked up, also smoking. _But_ he _could throw that cigarette at me and I wouldn't care._

“Don’t you have an update on _your_ assignment? Or were you too busy driving that... _thing_ around with your awful music?”, Hastur almost hissed, although Eric knew it was only Crowley who hissed. Crowley was the Snake of Eden, and it was a bit of a secret in Hell in that he was actually feared and respected.

“Pretty sure I can do that while on assignment, unless you’d rather I walk, or slither, which would take, I dunno, days. Sorry, when was the last time you were on Earth...?”

“Never you mind”, Hastur cut in. “Spare me your lectures. I just need--”

“--What’re you doing with that one there?” Crowley diverted, nodding towards Eric. “Please tell me you’re not gonna feed him to the Hellhound”. He was actually serious about that; he really hadn’t the stomach for that sort of thing. Or any sort of torture. Just reading his commendation on the Spanish Inquisition (which they’d believed he’d been responsible for) had sent him into a tailspin of drinking for a week.

“No, that’s too kind”, Hastur smiled wryly. “He’s about to be tortured because he lost a subject on an assignment, delaying their corruption. The Boss won’t be happy”.

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “Oh, you lot are so focused on deadlines and every little thing. You really think the Boss will care about _one_ human? Think big, Hastur. Better to take care of lots of people at a time, like I’m doing. Bit of a waste of resources there, don’t y’think? Those demons are disposable; you can just assign another one--”

“--We have to make examples out of incompetent people--”

“--Wellllll”, Crowley drawled, “why don’t you ‘punish’ him by assigning him to be with me?” He tossed the cigarette before continuing quickly: “I do have an update, by the way. There’s a fashion show coming up for that brand you assigned me to. Perfect opportunity for vanity, materialism...lust”. He was circling Hastur now.

Hastur grunted. “Fair enough. As long as I don’t have to deal with either of you right now..!” 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eric couldn’t stop smiling. He’d admired Crowley for so long, with his sleek fashion sense and oblivious attitude. He never did things the way Hastur wanted--he certainly had his own methods--but he still always achieved results, sometimes on a grander scale. From what Eric had seen, it was creativity and big-picture thinking, which Hell very much disliked.

Eric wanted to be him, yes, but he couldn’t help being attracted to him, either. He was curious if anyone could. Well, besides Hastur.

He was also so _nervous_ , though--he was meeting his idol, after all. He’d never actually had the chance (or was it courage) to talk to him, and they hadn’t previously been assigned to work together.

_Now what? I--_

“Come along, love”, Crowley purred like he always did, although Eric wanted to pretend it was just for him. The boots echoing in the hallways sent him. _What is he even doing here, in Hell?_ Eric thought. _He’s so much better than this...so_ clean, _and these hallways are so squalid. He’s too good to be here--_

“Where are we going?” Eric asked sheepishly. He had zero information on this assignment besides Crowley’s statement about the fashion show.

Crowley smiled; that irresistible grin.

“You’ll see”.


	2. Fashion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eric and Crowley arrive at the fashion show. Eric literally can’t handle it.

_What in the Heaven is going on…_ Eric was totally confused. The venue they were at was spacious, in contrast to the crowded hallways of Hell. It had vaulted ceilings with flashing lights everywhere, and unrelenting loud music that was giving him a headache. Why did humans like this? He didn’t get to go up on Earth very much, and most of the other demons didn’t either, so it wasn’t like they could tell him. But this was Crowley’s world, and he needed to learn. Crowley, of course, had signed them up as models and had backstage passes.

“What is it we’re supposed to be doing?” Eric asked once they were backstage, shyly again, internally kicking himself.

“We are gonna tempt these humans in here to materialism...and sprinkle in a little lust. Here--put this on”.

Eric did know some about fashion from the human culture he’d studied (much to Hell’s chagrin), but he hadn’t seen it put into practice, except where Crowley was concerned. He stared blankly at the garment that Crowley had put in front of him--some sort of sparkly black robe. “W--we’re in the show?!”

Crowley stared at him blankly. “How would we _not_ be in the show? What, d’y’think we’re up here to watch? We’re the only people with style in Hell. Look at you. You’ve got those gorgeous eyelashes, and that wild hair--people will love the whole avant-garde look you’ve got going on”. That flirty smile again.

 _Oh my Satan...did he just...say I have style and that….I’m gorgeous?!_ Eric thought he was going to faint. Crowley kept going on. “And well, me….you know. I’m me. Come on, let’s get ready. The assistants will take you to your dressing room”.


	3. The Goon Squad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After recovering, Eric and Crowley walk the catwalk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW - flashbacks to verbal abuse by Hastur; mentions of abuse.

“Your time to walk is coming up soon”. Crowley was the one who couldn’t stop smiling now. _This is his element_ , Eric thought. _But it’s not mine...I’ve never done anything cool...I’ve barely even been to Earth._

“I don’t know what to do....what if I fall….what if I look stupid….” Eric was almost crying.

“Baby, you won’t. I mean, if I weren’t here, you might. But, I’ve done miracles to stop all that. Remember, we need to be convincing”.

“Oh...okay”. Eric was still nervous though. What were humans even like? So many of them out there. He felt like fainting again. _Not good this time._ His vision blurred and the room spun.

“Whoa, love...I’ve got you”, Eric heard when he opened his eyes. He almost fainted again… _Crowley was holding him in his arms, so tenderly…_

“You alright..?” came the deep, honeyed voice.

“Um...I…”

“You might want to wait a bit before you go out”.

“Yeah, I….” Eric did not want to move. He heard himself saying, “I want you to hold me…” Oh Satan, what was he doing? He hadn’t meant to say that out loud. But the truth was, it wasn’t just Crowley being there, holding him like that….he was _exhausted._ Hastur might’ve thought he was punishing him by assigning him here, but Eric was finally away from him for a time...from the yelling, the threats, the _abuse_ of it all. He just wanted to rest.

“Yeah, love?” Crowley cooed, caressing Eric’s cheek softly. _Can he tell I need him..that I’m so tired?_ The long, smooth fingers lulled him to sleep for a bit.

***

Had he been dreaming? He could only make out a sea of lights swirling around him still.

“You good?”

It was _him_ , still holding poor, tired Eric. But...why?

“I--”

“Shush. Hastur did a number on you, didn’t he? And you like this type of stuff...you’ve been wanting to do something like this, yeah? Well, you can. I knew you had. I wanted to distract him. And he’ll do anything to not have to deal with me”.

“Th-thank you--” Eric couldn’t even talk. Crowley was stroking his hair now.

“Look, do what you want. It’s your time to shine”. He lifted him up.

Eric couldn’t do anything except stare at his fellow demon lovingly, his lengthy eyelashes bobbing just slightly.

“I _have_ wanted to do this...but I don’t get to come up here much. No one’s ever let me--or the rest of the Disposables--”

“I know. You’ve been their prisoner”. Crowley gestured towards the curtain. “But you can do something about it”.  
Eric wasn’t so terrified anymore, and felt the wooziness wearing off.  
He stepped out onto the catwalk.

What was he even wearing? Crowley had set him up in that long, black,glittery robe of some sort. _Is this what the humans wear now? Well, if so, I could get used to this..._. It was actually quite comfy. He’d been given some platform boots to walk in, which he surmised would literally be his downfall if Crowley hadn’t done a miracle to prevent something like that. The robe--or dress, or whatever it was--had a white ruffly collar to it, which Crowley said was inspired by the Elizabethan era.

Crowley had also told him not to look at anyone, to just stare straight ahead, which would help with nerves. He must have also dimmed the lights, because they weren’t bothering Eric anymore. He was able to keep his gaze focused, but his demon hearing allowed him to hear the gasps of everyone near the catwalk.

_What if they’re laughing at me…?_

_Keep going,_ said Crowley’s voice in his head. _You’re doing great._  
That was new, but what was noticeably absent to him was Hastur’s voice, which usually would be in there telling him he was nothing, that he was simply disposable, and his siblings would be there to replace him, until they’d served their purpose, too.  
There was only peace now, with Crowley cheering him on and Hastur’s voice gone. He stopped caring what anyone in the audience thought.

”My turn”, Crowley grinned as Eric returned backstage. Eric couldn’t help but gasp. Crowley had on leather pants, a sequined black blazer, and platform boots like Eric’s. He kept his signature sunglasses on.

Eric peeked out from behind the curtains. He had always loved how Crowley walked...and now he was beginning to understand what that walk was made for. He froze, mesmerised, until one of the assistants pulled him backstage to get him back to his dressing room.


	4. Beep Beep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eric and Crowley head to a bar after the fashion show, and Crowley suggests the unexpected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW - mention of past abuse by Hastur

”Well, what did you think?” Crowley asked as they zipped past pedestrians in the Bentley. “Enough excitement for one day?”

Eric was proud of himself for having been calm during the fashion show, although he was panicking now at the Bentley’s speed. “Um…”

”--Good”, Crowley cut in, “‘cause there’s more excitement coming”. He parked outside of a swanky bar. “You ever been to one of these?”

Eric shook his head.

”This is where humans go to hang out and...just generally sin. _Hotbeds_ of sin, these”. He came around to the other side of the car to hold the door open for Eric. “But, we’ve completed our assignment, so we’re just going to wind down for a bit”. They walked up some stairs to the arched entrance, Eric realising he was still not over Crowley’s catwalk scene.

Crowley had ordered some sort of drink that Eric suspected was very costly. He didn’t know anything about Earth traditions, but he reckoned it was quite strong. Crowley was trying to pour him some. Eric thought it would be rude to say no.

”Go on, love. It’s not Holy Water”. Eric drank a little and.... _liked_ it? What was this? It was delicious, whatever it was.  
Crowley was chuckling. “They never let you drink anything? Even wine?”  
“They don’t let us enjoy the Earthly pleasures--”  
“Oh my Satan”. Crowley muttered, rolling his head to one side, his arms spread out across the booth they were in.  
Eric cleared his throat. “Listen, Crowley, I need to--”  
“No need to thank me. I saw what Duke Hastur was doing, and you lot aren’t his only target. There are others who have suffered his abuse, yeah? Sometimes I wish I could just break free of it. There’s only one of me, which is either good or bad depending on how you look at it. But you--there are so many of you; surely they wouldn't notice if one went missing”.

“They would”, Eric’s voice was low; he didn’t look at Crowley. “Duke Hastur would find me no matter what”.  
“No”, Crowley scoffed. “He’s not that good”.  
“I would rather not take the chance--”  
“--Really? Because from what I saw, you took a chance today”. Crowley poured himself some more of the drink. “You loved it. You’re up here, now. You could just...y’know...not go back”. He shrugged and took another sip.  
Eric chuckled shyly, trying to hide how focused he was on those long, thin fingers. “You’re just saying things”.  
“‘M not”.  
“But, what about the other Disposables? I’d feel terrible if I were up here and they were stuck down there”.  
Crowley thought for a minute. “Aren’t you lot a hive mind? Couldn’t you just...call them up here or something? And you wouldn’t be ‘Disposable’ anymore, mind”.  
“Well, yes, but Duke Hastur would be able to sense that”.  
“Would he now”. Crowley was serious. Could it be true, though..? Was Duke Hastur just making empty threats about his powers?

“Listen”, Crowley was saying. “That’s a lot to think about, and we can revisit it later. But I do know I can at least cloak you, so he can’t find you that way. Even if he is somehow that competent”. He raised an eyebrow.  
“Y--you would do that for me?”  
“I think everyone is deserving of a new start, yes. I certainly don’t want anyone to go through what he’s been putting me through. And...I can’t say I haven’t had my eye on you. You _are_ quite fetching”.  
Eric didn’t know what to do except cry, especially as Crowley beamed at him. Crowley held and shushed him, leaving soft kisses on his cheek. He wanted to melt into the floor.

As they got back into the car, Crowley said, “I have a song for you. Or, well, the car does. She plays certain songs. By a certain band. You’ll see--”  
Freddie Mercury sang on the Bentley’s sound system. Eric didn’t know who that was, but he liked the song. He liked it even more after Crowley leaned in to kiss him, his soft lips and strong scent overtaking Eric, enveloping him in his new freedom. _Beep, beep_ went the Bentley’s horn as they took off down the street.

> _I want to break free from your lies  
>  You're so self satisfied I don't need you  
>  I've got to break free  
>  God knows, God knows I want to break free  
>  I've fallen in love  
>  I've fallen in love for the first time  
>  And this time I know it's for real  
>  I've fallen in love, yeah  
>  God knows, God knows I've fallen in love._


End file.
